oh hey...

yeah... so about the whole being crazy for loving him...still??

yeah...i'm dating him again lol and i'm happy so yay! lol hope it stays like this tho

heres a pic of us:

I'm crazy!

oh kay...yeah i'm definitely crazy.......

why?

i love him still.

even though he broke my heart.

More than once.

maybe stupid is the word.

Who in the freakin hell knows! {lol}

~Crazy Teen

*What the Freakin Hell?!*

heres a diary entry...
Sunday, March 7, 2010 8:23pm

am i the only one thats a blundering idiot when it comes to guys? Am i the only one that keeps falling for the same guy that i know i shouldn't bcuz he broke my heart multiple times before, but still do anyways? And then i get my damn heart broken. again. It damn sure seems like it!
How can he claim to love me yet still date other people? And of all the people he could date, he chooses M, Orin's ex who dumped him for shilo who was, in my opinion, not a good guy... (just wanted girls for...well you kno)... so what does that say about me, or what he thinks of me if i'm grouped in the same category with her?
I'm just so confused. He asked me "what happened to sticking together no matter what?" but how am i supposed to be close to him (or around him at all) when i'm broken...? How can i do that without causing myself pain??
What the freakin hell (thanks auntie for that saying) was i thinking falling for him again?!?!
OH YEAH!!! I WASN'T THINKING!!!

~Crazy Teen <3

I've become pretty poetic in the last couple months.
Here are some i've written recently:

The numbness takes over. There's nothing left to feel. You stole my heart. You kept it captive. Almost against my will. ...But i let you keep it Thinking you'd take care And keep it safe this time. But you didn't. You broke it. You tore it to pieces. You shattered my heart. You shattered me.
*******
A Butterflies wings Against her face, Her mothers hands Around her waist, No laughter goes to waste. Kisses Kisses Kisses A charming smile and gorgeous eyes, Their first kiss Brings butterflies, They embrace And she sighs. Kisses Kisses Kisses Wrinkles and lines Around her lips, A bad back And replaced hips, Waiting eagerly for Death's kiss. Kisses Kisses Kisses
*******
Time slips by slowlyOne grain at a timeAs i wait for life to come.Life flits by fastWhile i'm locked awayAs i wait for my freedom.Freedom never comesMy heart sits emptyAs i wait for Death to come
*********
I let you in I fell for you Against my better judgement. You said those words That seemed true But were filled with empty promises. Those three words "I love you" Did you really honestly mean it? How could you? I loved you. Now you broke me. Again.

Is there anyone out there???

hey all!!!

sorry its been awhile since i've blogged, i got caught up in facebook and all those other sites lol....but aunt sam like forced me to do this :D so its all good!!

heres an update:
i'm a sophmore in high school and its going pretty well except for the fact that i can't seem to pass biology (i have a C...i never do that!), but Algebra II is going pretty well so thats super good :)
my best friend heather decided this summer that she didn't wanna be my friend anymore and she like emailed me this summer and told me that i had changed and BS like that...so whateva. If she's naive enough to think that no one changes, then i don't want anything to do with her. But she can't even look at me at school...can't even make eye contact...i mean what the hell is up with that!?
oh and boys.... yeah i dated david for like 6 months and then was forced to break up with him by my parents, then i dated Russ Clark (he's a sweetie and also a senior) but yeah we broke up after 2 weeks cuz he claimed i was too clingy (i can't help the fact that i fell in love with him the day i met him, which was years ago) and now he's dating one of my best friends again (who had dated him b4 i did)(oh and me and my friend made a no-more-Russ pact) she broke the pact officially on new years so yeah its not like that hurt or anything rite? (pssht not!)...and then theres Mitch...he's my other sweetie (or was) the same friend that is now with Russ gave me his number and yeah we started txting constnantly, and then he claimed he loved me, so long story short: i fell really hard for him like really really really hard for him... but now my other friend Shelly is in love with him too which totally freakin hurts you know?

so in other words: i'm in a screwed up situation when it comes to guys. wouldn't be a first huh.

~GN <3